Shine your light.
I never thought it would be so hard to make changes in my life that could affect others positively. That quote i picked out is way harder to act on than i thought it would be. People say a smile can brighten up someone's day, right? I smiled at a teacher who looked like he was in a bad mood and then everyone thought i was a suck up. How did the world get to be like that? I do something nice so I'm a kiss-ass. I do something mean so I'm a bitch. Can't i have an inbetween? I do something nice and I make someone smile. No rewards, no pestering. Wouldn't it be nice if people could do good deeds just for the sake of doing good deeds? Not for praise and not for acceptance. I wish that people would just be kind to one another. I wish that I could be a friend to people who need a friend, but I'm too shy to chat. I wish I knew how to brighten a person's day the way that others know how to brighten mine. I wish that wishes came true.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Monday, March 2, 2009
You Remind Me Of A Former Love
I Have Friends In Holy Spaces
hello old friend,
i haven't seen you in a while.
isn't it funny
that you still know how to make me smile?
do you still know my secret?
I'm sure you wouldn't ever tell.
a twisted fate put us
farther apart than your heaven and my hell
back within arms reach
could we just have one last long, slow, dance?
i would never take it back
even now, as I'm given this one last long, slow, chance.
hello old friend,
i haven't seen you in a while.
isn't it funny
that you still know how to make me smile?
do you still know my secret?
I'm sure you wouldn't ever tell.
a twisted fate put us
farther apart than your heaven and my hell
back within arms reach
could we just have one last long, slow, dance?
i would never take it back
even now, as I'm given this one last long, slow, chance.
When The Guilt Sets In
A Secret Oath
today just doesn't feel right, it feels like things are going by in slow motion. minutes feel like days, hours like weeks. i don't know what's going on- strike that- i do, but its one of those things that i just don't have the nerve to explain. i'm in a fog. i know what i want but i can't have it. i know what i need but i don't have a way of getting it. i lost my chance what seems like years ago and i'll admit that this pain is my fault. there's no one to blame because no one tried to do this, no one pushed forward. just me. song to describe my mood, "if i hadnt blown the whole thing years ago, i might not be alone." Hey Jealousy, The Gin Blossoms Another song- "you've brainwashed me and now i'm more confused. i still somehow hope i'll end up with you." Himerus & Eros, The Spill Canvas
today just doesn't feel right, it feels like things are going by in slow motion. minutes feel like days, hours like weeks. i don't know what's going on- strike that- i do, but its one of those things that i just don't have the nerve to explain. i'm in a fog. i know what i want but i can't have it. i know what i need but i don't have a way of getting it. i lost my chance what seems like years ago and i'll admit that this pain is my fault. there's no one to blame because no one tried to do this, no one pushed forward. just me. song to describe my mood, "if i hadnt blown the whole thing years ago, i might not be alone." Hey Jealousy, The Gin Blossoms Another song- "you've brainwashed me and now i'm more confused. i still somehow hope i'll end up with you." Himerus & Eros, The Spill Canvas
You Wear Your Heart On Your Sleeve;
I Throw Mine To The Sky.
So I've decided that once a week I will find a new quote that seems to jump out at me and take it as a sign that I need to work on whatever it says. I'll post it here and try to live by the rules or ideas that it states. This week's quote: "Be the change that you wish to see in the world." -Mahatma Gandhi, Guru Extraordinaire.
Sunday, March 1, 2009
The Truth Is...
so tonight i'll sit and pick apart your pictures and i'll over analyze your words.
all hail the heartbreaker, TSC
a montage of song lyrics to describe how i feel:
you've got me down on my knees and i proclaim, "all hail the heartbreaker."
all hail the heartbreaker, TSC
when you see my face, hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell.
gives you hell, AAR
swing, swing, swing from the tangles of my heart
swing, swing, AAR
don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret
dirty little secret, AAR
theres a lonliness inside her and she's do anything to fill it in. she could change everything about her using colors bold and bright but al the colors mix together- to grey
grey street, DMB
the dreaming tree has died.
dreaming trees, DMB
never, never. i had a feeling this would never, never.
temper temper, envy on the coast
when we hear hearts break, we'll say they're playing our song.
speakers blown, hit the lights
and i'm still waiting, waiting on the world to change.
waiting on the world to change, john mayer
tell me anything, anything to keep me breathing.
your stories, my alibis, matchbook romance
my cars outside, i want to leave.
maybe misery, quietdrive
hopeless love, how did you carve your home in me?
hopeless love, daphne loves derby
you have no idea what you're doing to me. i dont know how you jumped your way into my heart.
pandora, madina lake
i've been thinking, over thinking 'cause there's just too many scenarios to analyze... i'll break my heart in two more times that you could ever do.
over thinking, relient k
sometimes perfection can be perfect hell.
bruised, jack's mannequin
oh pilot can you help me, can you make this last?
bruised, jack's mannequin
every inch of me is bruised.
bruised, jack's mannequin
this is the end of my montage of emotion, mostly because i don't give a shit right now and i dont know a song that says apathy in the proper context.
all hail the heartbreaker, TSC
a montage of song lyrics to describe how i feel:
you've got me down on my knees and i proclaim, "all hail the heartbreaker."
all hail the heartbreaker, TSC
when you see my face, hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell.
gives you hell, AAR
swing, swing, swing from the tangles of my heart
swing, swing, AAR
don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret
dirty little secret, AAR
theres a lonliness inside her and she's do anything to fill it in. she could change everything about her using colors bold and bright but al the colors mix together- to grey
grey street, DMB
the dreaming tree has died.
dreaming trees, DMB
never, never. i had a feeling this would never, never.
temper temper, envy on the coast
when we hear hearts break, we'll say they're playing our song.
speakers blown, hit the lights
and i'm still waiting, waiting on the world to change.
waiting on the world to change, john mayer
tell me anything, anything to keep me breathing.
your stories, my alibis, matchbook romance
my cars outside, i want to leave.
maybe misery, quietdrive
hopeless love, how did you carve your home in me?
hopeless love, daphne loves derby
you have no idea what you're doing to me. i dont know how you jumped your way into my heart.
pandora, madina lake
i've been thinking, over thinking 'cause there's just too many scenarios to analyze... i'll break my heart in two more times that you could ever do.
over thinking, relient k
sometimes perfection can be perfect hell.
bruised, jack's mannequin
oh pilot can you help me, can you make this last?
bruised, jack's mannequin
every inch of me is bruised.
bruised, jack's mannequin
this is the end of my montage of emotion, mostly because i don't give a shit right now and i dont know a song that says apathy in the proper context.
They Washed Me Shore And They Took My Pearl
Deep Blue
Swallowed whole by the deep blue sea
Drowning in endless mystery, endless misery
Just when I thought the worst was over
Another wave came crashing down
Stealing my hopefulness, my confidence
Leaving an empty shell of who I used to be
What do I make of this blank, new me?
Surrounded by walls of water- hold my breath, pray for death
Watching in silence as I watch lives draining out
The only thing I know is the deep blue enveloping me
A blue of starry skies, soul piercing eyes
Suddenly engulfed in dismal black
Gasping for air just seconds left-
The end of life? The end of strife.
The deep blue vanishing before my eyes
No longer smothered by the violent waves
From the blue I’m rising up, rising out
Nothing to hold me back
Time to stretch my wings and learn to fly
I’ll fly far, fly free, fly to find a new me
Take a flight that’s bittersweet
Just like the salt of the sea deep blue.
Swallowed whole by the deep blue sea
Drowning in endless mystery, endless misery
Just when I thought the worst was over
Another wave came crashing down
Stealing my hopefulness, my confidence
Leaving an empty shell of who I used to be
What do I make of this blank, new me?
Surrounded by walls of water- hold my breath, pray for death
Watching in silence as I watch lives draining out
The only thing I know is the deep blue enveloping me
A blue of starry skies, soul piercing eyes
Suddenly engulfed in dismal black
Gasping for air just seconds left-
The end of life? The end of strife.
The deep blue vanishing before my eyes
No longer smothered by the violent waves
From the blue I’m rising up, rising out
Nothing to hold me back
Time to stretch my wings and learn to fly
I’ll fly far, fly free, fly to find a new me
Take a flight that’s bittersweet
Just like the salt of the sea deep blue.
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